Archive for the ‘zonora point’ Tag

BASS MUSIC FOR CREEPS   Leave a comment

Where do you listen to music? The girl’s bathroom? The school playground? You’re a creep. Even if you’re a girl it’s kinda creepy unless you have a kid and the kid is playing on the playground and you happen to be there to look after the little fucker. But then even if that is the case, why do you have your headphones on? Maybe your kid is screaming. You’ll never hear them. You’re a bad mother. This is not Parenting Today. Is there a blog called Parenting Today? Who cares. Fuckers are here for some fucking tunes so why don’t we drop the pretense and get straight to the point. Just straight up bass music for your stupid asses. GO GRAB THOSE TUNES AFTER THE JUMP FUCK FACES!

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BASSKETBALL   Leave a comment

The Dirty Fucking Fremchman never saw Baseketball. He was probably readings books like a bitch. You hear that kids? Only bitches read books. Don’t read. Don’t stand out by being smart. No one likes smart people. In a sense, being smart is stupid. Make that your slogan. Anyway. There has been so much shit coming out music wise that we can’t keep the fuck up. Also we like to drink. If you drink you feel like fucking puking. If you feel like fucking puking it’s hard to be funny. That’s our life. WHY DON’T YOU GO GRAB SOME FUCKING TRACKS FOR THE FUCKING WEEKEND WHILE WE CHUG WATER AND MUNCH ADVILS!

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WHERE BASS AND YOUR MOM’S PUSSY MEET   Leave a comment

Which came first: bass or your mom’s pussy? The answer may surprise you. Or not. Maybe you already know. You are like an expert in that shit. You also are an expert in farts that hiss out of your ass and for some reason last like a whole fucking minute. You have your likes and you specialties. Who are we to tell you how to live your life? Anyway, maybe you need to shift your focus and concentrate on other things like music. Maybe these tunes will inspire you to change your life and become a doctor or architect. Maybe they will convince you to climb back up your mom’s pussy. THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY TO KNOW! GO CHECK OUT THE FUCKING TUNES AFTER THE JUMP! Read the rest of this entry »

SOUDCLOUDS THAT LIVE OUTDOORS   Leave a comment

Look at these two assholes disc jockeying out doors like Irishmen. We always put up pictures of other djs but it’s been a long time since we put up pictures of our own selves. Plan B and The Dirty Frenchman tearing shit up like they have a bunch of secret documents they don’t want anyone to read. Thanks to those amazing fucks Gooffee for having us spin and big shout out to Mem Rx for coming through with great tunes and great equipment to pull the whole thing off. It ended up being the best Nuit Blance ever. The scene:

Yeah. Fucking insanity. CHECK OUT THE SONGS WE MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE PLAYED AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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STRAIGHT OUT THE MEAN STREETS OF SANTIAGO   Leave a comment

Briefcase mysteries in a Pulp Fiction style

Posted March 29, 2011 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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FUCKING FUCKMAS AGAIN FOR YOUR STUPID ASSES   Leave a comment

Drop the Lime – Hot as Hell (Canblaster Remix) (zshare)

It’s that fucking time again when Santa Claus goes to the houses of rich kids to give them gifts and tells poor kids to go fuck themselves. That for us is the magic of Christmas along with getting drunk with our families and having to take huge shits after eating so much food. This is also the time when, between these epic shits, we post a ton of songs. What do we have this year, some good stuff, some amazing news, some sad news and a lot of meaningless bullshit you have come to expect and love. Take the song above, it’s fucking masterpiece. It’s like you’re in a spaghetti western but in an island in the Gulf of Thailand, perhaps off the coast of Cambodia or Vietnam. Why do we make this comparaison. This fucking specific comparaison? Because that is where The Dirty Frenchman is leaving for in two days. Yes. For a month. This is how he expects it to be:

Guido – Mad Sax (zshare)

Before he embarked on this trip down into the very heart of darkness, The Dirty Frenchman wanted to record 3 mixes which he did yesterday but then, sadly the recording fucked up and now only the right stereo side recorded so they sound like shit. So that didn’t happen. He’s pissed because he wanted to be like a fucking Tupac recording himself and then releasing shit while he was gone, maybe even dead. That’s dark some dark shit.

This fucking party is taking place where Plan fucking B is gonna spin with some guy named Destro on New Years or rather, as Plan B calls it, Jew Years. Be there if you like good music and wanna be murdered by tunes like these:

Oh yeah, sorry we never told you but those Gooffee assholes just dropped a free EP today on your sorry asses. That’s a lot of sorry in there. You need to learn to let things go and get on with your life. Maybe listen to a song like this which sounds like when you are having a moment and then realizing everything you ever believed was wrong but you’re happy about it.

Girl Unit – Wut (zshare)

“I’m happy about my fucking world collapsing!”

You (2010)

Oh and did you know that Douster and Zonora Point did a free mixtape EP that you can listen to here:

and download here as individual tracks.

oh and Brodinski released a collection of the best hip hop and r’n’b remixes of the year (in his opinion) here’s his picks:

and here are the tracks for download.

Wow. That enough news and music to last next while. Look forward for dispatches from The Dirty Frenchman in the Orient and get the fuck to Lot 16 for fucking New Years!

 

ALL KINDS OF SOUNDS FUCKING YOU   1 comment

Hello guys! I’m Jerry Seinfeld. Don’t you hate when you’re at the gas station and you’re pumping the gas and by accident some gas falls on your crotch and everyone think you peed your pants but you didn’t? They should just call it “pee gas”. Right? Am I right? Anyways, I want to take a minute to talk to you about some music that I like that I got in the Soundclouds and in my email. Speaking of email, why is called email? It’s on a computer. They should call it cmail. Lol.

Rihanna – Only Girl (Murlo Remix)

That song was like the time I was freaking out about the stuff you have to go through at the airport.

I was like “What’s the deal with metal detectors?” and someone was like “To detect metal you stupid fuck.” and I was all like “Er. Yeah. Damn.” So after I went to the aiport lounge to have a drink because I had looked stupid and alcohol generaly tends to make me feel more confident and better about myself. Sometimes when I drink it, I even feel like I’m funny. I got so drunk and had to go throw up in the toilet over and over again between trying to talk to a young lady who said her parents loved my show. I was so upset at that toilet there. It kept on asking to swallow more and more of my vomit and what was I to do? Refuse? I got kicked out.

Whip My Hair (Crizzly Remix) (mediafire download link)

This last song reminds me of the time I was trying to explain something to someone and making observations about things.

And they were like “Your brand of comedy has fucking aged badly.” And then I wished it was the 1990’s again but it wasn’t and I took three Tylenol 3 pills to feel better and then talked for 4 hours to the sink about what the deal with the toilet was. The saddest part is that there was no deal with the toilet. It just sat there doing nothing the whole time. I had to flush it just to get a reaction from it. That toilet needs to come down a notch.

Zonora Point & Douster – El mejor

This last song really tells the story of the time I was hanging out with my friends: The Racist, The Fat Guy and The Hot Chick Who Dressed Like She Was Not Hot So You Were Not Sure If You Wanted To Bang Her. The Racist was acting like he was all bugged out like he was on cocaine but he was not or at least he was not supposed to be. We spent 30 minutes arguing if it was better to have the toilet paper roll feeding out from the top or the bottom and the chick pushed me saying “Get out of here!” and I fell into the toilet and I was like “Hey buddy. Thanks for catching me. You’re not such an asshole after all.”

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