Archive for the ‘them jeans’ Tag

POST APOCALYPTIC BASS: NO MOOMBAH FUCKERS   Leave a comment

After the fucking apocalypse there will be no room for moombahton. No light-hearted fun at the end of the world. We will need bass and plenty of it. People who listen to moombahton after the apolcalypse will be moving too slow. Cannibals will easily catch up with them. People who are listening to bass may be moving even slower. But they will be heavily armed with axes and hammers. People who listen to moombahton will be armed with hugs. You can’t kill a person with hugs unless you are some kind of musclebound bohemoth. There are probably like 3 people in the world that like moombahton and are also musclebound bohemoths. They will be the only people to carry the moombahton torch into the future. They still might get fucking killed by a bunch of people who like bass music if those people gang up on them. HERE’S SOME BASS MUSIC TO BE PREPARED AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

Read the rest of this entry »

COOL SOUNDCLOUDS ASSHOLE   Leave a comment

Hey bro. Cool soundclouds. Where did you get them? Soundcloud.com? Cool. Thanks bro. Gonna check out that site after I get home. Did you see my car? It’s pretty fuckin sweet. Car won’t shut the fuck up but otherwise it’s cool. I think you’re cool bro. It’s fucking cool all around. You wanna be my friend? I got tickets to a Clippers game. Remember that one season they did alright? Maybe they’ll do it again bro. I’ll order nachos. It’ll be cool. Come on bro. We can listen to soundclouds after together. Driving in my car. They will sound like THESE ONES AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

Read the rest of this entry »

THIS FRIDAY EITHER GO TO BINGO OR CRAWL BACK UP YOUR MOM’S PUSSY. ALSO, SWAG.   2 comments

BINGO BINGO BINGO

W A L M E R  F U C K I N G  C O N V E N I E N C E

SPINNING SHIT THE FUCK UP AT THIS SHIT

MOOBAHCLAAT/RAPE HOP/FUCKHALL

ATTEND ON THE FACEBOOK

ONLY YOU CAN STOP FOREST FIRES

We may play these choice tunes. AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

Read the rest of this entry »

THE SOUND THAT FUCKS THE CRADLE   Leave a comment

There are so many songs in the world that sometimes we just want to go crazy. It’s like American Beauty except it should be called Canadian Beauty and it should star us instead of Kevin Spacey and some has-beens (or just all has-beens). Whatever. Relax. Play some music. Do a line of blow off a breast. Take a chill pill. Take a fuck pill like the viagras. Want some tunes? THEY’RE AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP PERVERTS!

Read the rest of this entry »

YOU FUCKED THE SOUNDCLOUDS   6 comments

BOOOOOOOYYYAAAAAHHHHHHH! This is William Gary Busey here but you can call me Billy Busey or better yet Gary Busey but don’t call me late for dinner. Get it? That’s a total laugh out loud. You know? Internet speak? The Walmer Conveniences blog has asked me to tweet to you the music that moves the soul within my body. Have you ever listened to music before? It sticks the penis of sound into your ears and and makes you have feelings. The sound then ejaculates into you senses and impregnates your body with music. This is called rhythm. Do you get it? When the baby of feelings is born, that’s when you know the song really hit you. Will you have the baby of these songs? Does your brain have ovaries? Science. I’m not gay. LISTEN TO THEM AFTER THE JUMP:

Read the rest of this entry »

SOUNDCLOUDS FROM THE STREETS OF FUCK CITY!   3 comments

When was the last time you shit your pants? 10 years ago? 15 years ago? 1 year ago? If you answered yes to the last one then you have a problem. You are either a baby, a homeless person or a human vegetable. If that is the case we ask: How did you manage to go on the internet, find this blog and be able to read it? You should not be able to do that. Science just won’t fucking allow it. Stop disrespecting science and get yourself a fucking job and a sense of respect.

Anyway maybe one of you will shit your pants tomorrow. Whoever shits their pants next and can prove it to us wins a full writeup on the Walmer Blog. You could get a write up as a dj or music producer or maybe as a janitor or as a person that stands on a bridge over the freeway yelling at cars. You could be a star. Music is after THE FUCKING JUMP…

Read the rest of this entry »

FUCKING THE CLOUDS OF SOUND   Leave a comment

What can we say about the Zeds Dead that Charlie Sheen has not already said so eloquently? They have some new tunage for fuckers to download. They are the Japan nuclear crisis of music except that people don’t forget that they are still going on so maybe the Japan nuclear crisis is the Zeds Dead of nuclear crises. It’s complicated. You know how it works. That’s your relationship status on Facebook. With your wife (or husband if you are the proud owner of a vagina or gay). MUSIC IS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!!!

Read the rest of this entry »

%d bloggers like this: