Archive for the ‘spoek mathambo’ Tag

WEDNESDAY BONUS BASS!   Leave a comment

So it’s been a moombah (also known as moom moom)  fuckfest this week. Lots of new shit. But there is other great shit in other genres that we have had to ignore. So this is the time we are posting that shit. A person cannot live off moombahton alone. You would be going to slow. You would be late all the time. But you would still not be relaxed because you would still be going faster than rap or other bass musics. So let’s grab thos fucking tunes and pretend we have a wide spectrum of tastes beyond moombah based musics AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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POST APOCALYPTIC BASS: NO MOOMBAH FUCKERS   Leave a comment

After the fucking apocalypse there will be no room for moombahton. No light-hearted fun at the end of the world. We will need bass and plenty of it. People who listen to moombahton after the apolcalypse will be moving too slow. Cannibals will easily catch up with them. People who are listening to bass may be moving even slower. But they will be heavily armed with axes and hammers. People who listen to moombahton will be armed with hugs. You can’t kill a person with hugs unless you are some kind of musclebound bohemoth. There are probably like 3 people in the world that like moombahton and are also musclebound bohemoths. They will be the only people to carry the moombahton torch into the future. They still might get fucking killed by a bunch of people who like bass music if those people gang up on them. HERE’S SOME BASS MUSIC TO BE PREPARED AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

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OLD BASS AND THE SEA   1 comment

Do you like bass? Do you like the sea? Well then you should take these fucking songs and go to the sea and listen to them and stay out too long and get a sunburn and then do that again several fucking times and get skin cancer and go to the hospital and when you get there you can see how many people actually care about you and those that don’t fucking come are not your real friends and you can delete them from facebook and that will be your life. LIVE THAT FUCKING LIFE AFTER THE JUMP!

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NEW SOUNDCLOUDS FROM OLD TOWNS   Leave a comment

You went up to a village to see your fucking grandparents. They live in the mountains. All the mountains have caves in the shapes of pussies. That’s how mountains are. Look it up in the fucking dictionary. That’s where you learn things. In the pussy caves there are new hot soundclouds for you to discover. You do a line of blow off a breast. You’re fucking ready now. GO IN THERE AND GET THOSE TUNES AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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THE CLOUDS ARE FUCKING THE SOUNDS   Leave a comment

Pop quiz hotshots! Your mom walks into your room while you’re wacking off and listening to soundclouds. What do you do? Ha ha! Yeah, it’s me dudes. I’m Keanu fuckin Reeves. I love blow and I love weed and I love crying on the tits of teenage girls. That’s my job, that’s what I do. I don’t wanna answer any more questions about it. I’m just trying to keep the spirit of cowabunga alive in Hollywood because everyone else is keeping alive the spirit of bullshit and crap in this town. It’s no good I tell you. Every swanky party I get invited to, I piss on the food to show that food and piss are the same. It’s a statement. The kick me out and I laugh because in the end the joke is on them. They’re the sheeple. They’re the ones walking around with their eyes closed eating piss food and they don’t even know it. But really I’m getting off topic here. I didn’t come to teach you groovy life lessons from a duderino that has done blow off Julianne Moore’s freckled tits. I came to present you some music. And that’s what I’m gonna do AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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OLD UNCLE MURDA MIXTAPE FOUND IN OSAMA BIN LADEN’S COMPOUND   Leave a comment

The CIA has just released more information on the things that were found in Osama Bin Laden’s compound and this long hidden Uncle Murda global bass mixtape was discovered on one of the laptops. A listen to this mixtape cements Uncle Murda as the heir to the legacy of Spoek Mathambo. Will he be on the next Major Lazer mixtape?

DOWNLOAD THE MIXTAPE HERE!

GO TO THE NIGHTCLUB AND KILL SPOEK MATHOMBO   Leave a comment

Not really.

Brought to you by Reebok™: Made for fucking killing

Posted March 30, 2011 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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