Archive for the ‘riot earp’ Tag


If there’s one thing that god wants, it’s for us to post a shitload of tracks this day, a Friday, so you can fulfill your destiny of playing a good set at clubs if you are a dj or maybe you can use this music to impress some one of the opposite or same sex to sleep with you if you do not jockey discs. Either way, this is gonna help you step up your game. So why are you still on this page, you should be clicking after the jump to grab tunes! GO FUCKING GRAB SOME HOT FUCKING BASS MUSIC AFTER THE JUMP FUCKTARDS!

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Hey fucknuts! #Seapunk is back at Walmer with that fucker Riot Earp hitting you hard with his interpretation of underwater exploration called Whales & Bongs. You fucking listen to this while you swim with the whales and use a bong to breathe. That’s how you live in the sea. This track is exclusive to Walmer and we’re fucking happy to get this piece of madness from a musical killer like this mofo. GO GRAB IT AFTER THE JUMP FUCKERS!

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Posted March 1, 2012 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

Tagged with , , , , , ,


Hey bros! Do you have any blow? It’s me again, John C Reilly. I’m just was looking to score blow but also just wanted to tell you about fucking moombahton music and how I listen to it on my free time. I know I look like Colonel Sanders. I’m playing fucking Colonel Sanders in the movie about his fucking life. Yeah, it’s big. But the thing is, I need blow to play him. I need blow and then I do it and I listen to moombahton and then I “become” Colonel Sanders. His mind was like blow and moombahton mixed. That’s how he came up with the secret recipe for fried chicken that everyone wanted to eat like assholes. I was hanging out with Emilio Estevez on the weekend and he had great blow. He always had great blow. We always have good times out on the town me and him. You guys should come too. You know what, I’m just gonna fucking call Emilio. Forget the blow. I’m just gonna get it from him. Here take this moombahton though. GO GRAB A SHITLOAD OF MOOMBAHTON TRACKS AFTER THE JUMP CUNTS!

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What is Through The Wire? Is it this?:

No. It’s a bunch of top notch fucking producers who made songs through the internet like it was World of Warcraft or something. Except the probably get laid. Anyway, the download link is after the fucking jump. GO STREAM THE TRACKS AND DOWNLOAD THE WHOLE THING. THIS IS FUCKING BIG! Read the rest of this entry »


Chris Tucker woke up in his apartment in the not great part of town. It was 1pm. That’s the time he woke up everyday. He hadn’t worked for 2 years so he never had to get up early unless it was to get his welfare cheque. Chris Tucker collected welfare now. Even though he always got more than enough sleep because of the fact that nothing was going on in his life, he still enjoyed having a cup of coffee as a pick me up to start his day. It just made it feel complete. It made him feel complete if only for a few minutes. As the coffee brewed he looked at the fading picture of him and Jackie Chan that he had stuck on his old refrigerator.

Those had been better times. He remembered all the bitches he had fucked as a tag team with Jackie. They had done it to build up their partnership so that audiences would love their chemistry. He remembered all the blow that they had done together in the trailer off of breasts in between takes. Jackie liked to do lines of blow between girl’s assholes and pussies. He called it “Getting from Point A to Point P” except when he said it it was in Chinese and shit. Chris Tucker stood there for 10 more minutes looking at the picture,  revisiting all the highs and lows he had had in his former career as an actor. The coffee maker made a beep and brought Chris Tucker back to reality. He poured the warm liquid into his favourite mug and took a quick gulp. As the coffee hit his taste buds it was all wrong, it had a very sharp taste almost like vinegar but salty and it stung his tongue. He pulled the mug away from his face and looked inside and made a startling discovery. It was not coffee at all in his mug. It was pee. Chris Tucker had just drank pee. Floating in the pee were soundclouds. GO GRAB THOSE SOUNDCLOUDS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP TO KNOW WHAT CHRIS TUCKER EXPERIENCED!:

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Do you like classic rape? Uh, we mean do you like classic rap? Well if you like that and the moombahton then you have stumbled on the right fucking blog post. Jon Kwest, one of the leading compilation makers in the world of the moombahton has served up another fucking doozie to make your ass move like it’s remote controlled. But wait, don’t take our word for it. Take Mel Gibson’s word for it:

“I may be an anti-semite but I am not an anti-Moombahton Maraudersite. IF YOU DON”T LIKE THIS I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!”

So with that endorsement go grab the fucking moombah/native tongues compilation and fucking listen to those tracks AFTER THE DAMN JUMP!

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You took fucking drugs. You went to a museum. You couldn’t understand what the fuck was going on. You threw up everywhere. Everyone was pissed. They banned you from the museum for life. Now you can’t get fucking art smart. You walked down the fucking street. You slipped on a piece of runny dog shit. You twisted your fucking ankle. while you were on the ground crying like a bitch you saw a place. It was another museum. A moombahton museum. You went inside. You heard these fucking tracks that are AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP ASSCLOWNS!

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