Archive for the ‘moombahsoul’ Tag

MOOMBAHTON FUCKING EAR BEATDOWN   Leave a comment

Hey! Assholes! What’s up! You know what these moombahton tracks are gonna do to you? Gonna bite your fucking ear off is what. Gonna have a fucking piece of your ear missing. That will be your life. You can either deal with it or cry like a baby. An ear-less baby. Nobody wants an ear-less baby. Those get returned to the vagina in exchange for another baby. Because that how pregnancy works. Either that or a fucking bird brings your baby. Bird shit baby. Anyway. Enough about birds and babies. Let’s listen to some moombahton AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!:

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MOOMBAHLUV   Leave a comment

Moombahluv. It’s the opposite of Moombahhate which is coming soon. Or is it? No, it’s not. Anyway, DJ UMB from the Generation Bass Blog of Global Music got all these fuckers to make this and it’s got some good ass tracks. Maybe you should download it and then if you live in Canada you can play it during Canadian Thanksgiving this coming weekend and the you can read the words of Neil Queen Jones (who made this amazing post for us) to your fucking kids since he wrote the liner notes. It will be the greatest Canadian Thanksgiving of all. Even if you live somewhere else like some weird country like Germany you can still celebrate by going out to the woods, stabbing a turkey in the face and painting your body with it’s blood. That’s what we do for Canadian Thanksgiving. GO GRAB THIS FUCKING COMPILATION AND SAMPLE SOME TUNES AFTER THE JUMP:

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SOUDCLOUDS THAT LIVE OUTDOORS   Leave a comment

Look at these two assholes disc jockeying out doors like Irishmen. We always put up pictures of other djs but it’s been a long time since we put up pictures of our own selves. Plan B and The Dirty Frenchman tearing shit up like they have a bunch of secret documents they don’t want anyone to read. Thanks to those amazing fucks Gooffee for having us spin and big shout out to Mem Rx for coming through with great tunes and great equipment to pull the whole thing off. It ended up being the best Nuit Blance ever. The scene:

Yeah. Fucking insanity. CHECK OUT THE SONGS WE MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE PLAYED AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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SOUNDCLOUDS CAME ON YOUR FACE   Leave a comment

Hey. How the fuck are all of you? That picture up there is of The Uproot Andy from the SLOWED party in Toronto last Saturday. Starting tomorrow we will be djing 3 nights in a fucking row. We’re gonna spin way better than that guy and by that we mean 50% as good because he murdered it. He’s really fucking good. Kudos again to The Torro Torros and Le Dew Its for promising him a happy ending massage to get him to play in this town. If you want succeed in fucking show business YOU HAVE TO GIVE IT YOUR ALL! But rub and tugs aside, what with the whole UK moombahton spectacular and all that we’ve passed over a lot of good ass music that maybe you will like or maybe hate but whatever if you’re here you might as well listen because you’re a guest and it would be impolite so go listen to that shit AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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FUCKING SOUNDCLOUD STREET BATTLE   Leave a comment

Hey hey yo! Here’s some fucking fresh ass soundclouds. Check em the fuck out like it’s fucking cowabunga time dudes. Who wants pizza? Let’s do blow! PIZZA BLOW PARTY! Don’t forget the soda pop and potato chips (or crisps as they say in England). Your mom will be there and your sister. We call shotgun! Whatever that means. Which one is shotgun to you? Is your mom shotgun? Is your sister shotgun? YOU CAN ONLY CHOOSE ONE! Anyway. Let’s pop some tunes into the CD player and have ourselves a time AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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DJ DAVID HEARTBREAK PRESENTS MOOMBAHSOUL 2: THE CHRONICLES OF MOOMBIA   Leave a comment

Now there are two fucking problems we can foresee arising from this write up. First, there is no “The Chronicles of Moombia” attached to the name of the compilation. We just decided that that’s the fucking way we are gonna call it because we like overly long titles that become fucking stupid. That’s how we do things around here. Secondly we are gonna say that moombahsoul is all fine and good and for some reason mofos are all over that shit but sometimes we wanna hear exciting music that’s not super chill and sometimes we wanna dagger a girl instead of just gently winding up on her. David Heartbreaks has gone on record to say that there will be more moombahcore coming out of his brain soon. So get ready for that. For the moment you can have a girl gently rub your penis to this music. Have your boner come slowly. No need to rush the getting of the boner. In most cases your dick should still be around tomorrow. Hopefully. DOWNLOAD THE COMPILATION AND SAMPLE THE TUNES AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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MONDAY OF FUCKING MOOMBAHTON!   Leave a comment

Hey fuckers. I’m James Earl Jones. Yeah. Get used to it. I’m just here to write about some moombahton for the Walmer Convenience Musical Blog. I like the moombahton music a lot. It’s like the music of my life. On my tombstone it will read “James Earl Jones 1931-2015 See: Moombahton” and then when you read about moombahton you will be reading about me because it is the music of my soul. Yeah. That’s my wish. Gonna put it in my fucking will. Who has a pen? There. It’s in. I’m fucking James Earl Jones and that’s how serious I am about moombahton. Here, listen to these tunes AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

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THIS SHIT IS GOING THE FUCK DOWN IN TORONTO TOMORROW YOU CUNTS   Leave a comment

MOOMBAHSEX/MOOMBAHVIOLENCE

 

W A L M E R  F U C K I N G  C O N V E N I E N C E

VS

THE TORRO TORROS

VS

 THE YOUNG LORD

VS

MAYBE OTHER PEOPLE

CLICK THE INVITE FOR THE FACEBOOK

GRAB THESE TWO GREAT ASS TRACKS:

Jeremy Glenn – New Life (Torro Torro Rework) *SLOWED SUMMER FREE DOWNLOAD

Jay Z – Change Clothes (Starfoxxx moombahton remix)

AT WORK AND FEEL LIKE THROWING UP   Leave a comment

Yeah. At fucking work. Drank to many beers last night. Feel like fucking throwing up on the keyboard at this fucking computer. Don’t even know why this fucking picture is here. Just thought you wanted to know that a clean fucking restroom makes people fucking happy. If the restroom is dirty are people more likely to puke? Do people prefer to puke in clean restrooms like fucking royalty and shit? Are you too good for a dirty restroom? would you still shit in a dirty restroom if it meant either doing it in your pants or doing it there? Why do you think you’re so important? Relax. Just listen to these fucking songs AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP FUcKERS!

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SOUNDCLOUDS OF WRATH   Leave a comment

Hey hey! My name is Afrojacks. I invented moombahton. Fuck all of y’all. I don’t drink milk. I pour Crystal™ on my fucking cereal. I eat fucking Caviar Pops. They’re like Corn Pops but they taste like fucking fish and cost $2000 per box. That’s my life. That’s Afrojack. I’m working on a track with Justin Bieber. I fucked Lady Gaga. That was so weird. There were ostriches in the same room when it happened. One of them licked my right testicle. It’s tongue was rough. I still see it’s face when I close my eyes.

Have you met my friends yet? Bill.i.am is the fucking black dude from Blast Iced Fleas and there’s Dave Gettus and that guy from Florida who I don’t remember his name. Here’s some tracks AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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