Archive for the ‘ghislain poirier’ Tag


Crookers ft Poirier and Face-T – Arena (zshare)

Hey guys! Do you like Major Lazer? Great! You’ll love this song then. Crookers did their best to make it so that if you heard it you’d be like “Hey guys this new Major Lazer song is soooo fresh!”. And then everyone would be like “You spend to much time with your cat. This is Crookers.  Go eat your own ass with cinnamon toast crunch on it.”

It makes sense though. Crookers are just trying to stay famous. They’re like electro Ke$has.

Their album Tons of Friends is like “Let’s take whoever has a moderate amount of buzz around them lately and grab onto their coattails and hang on for dear life”. So they team up with Ghislain Poirier for this song who is for now the more budget friendly Major Lazer (but is just as talented).  It’s difficult because the music is not a steaming pile of garbage. A few of the songs are actually quite awesome. It’s more the idea of it that sucks. For example, there is another song that is Crookers and Drop the Lime. We think it’s more Drop the Lime with Crookers’ name on the lable.

Fuck! Look at the cover art of the album. Even that is Major Lazeresque. Enjoy your first and last album Crookers.

We’ll still play this song because it’s good. If people ask us who it is we will say “Some assholes”. Do a line of blow off a breast in disgust to this song.

WE HAVE MODERATE CLOUT VOL 3   Leave a comment

This is our private jet:

This is the laptop we use to spin:

This the car we use to take ladies home:


This time it’s a mixed bag. We have some crazy pum pum activation shit and some mediocre we don’t know what to think of it shit.

First the good news:

ZZK Records aka the best damn label from South America sent us this news:

BUENOS AIRES, ARG. (Feb. 16, 2010) – “Las Americas V.1,” the latest EP from Buenos Aires-based record label ZZK Records, is set for digital release next Tuesday, February 16. Produced by Poirier, a DJ/producer from Montreal, “Las Americas” features a reggaeton-inspired track with vocals by Boogat. The album, which also includes remixes from Uproot Andy, El Remolon, Lagartijeando, and Douster, is sure to unite Montreal and Buenos Aires as hermanos in music.

Here are the tracks to preview:

Ghislain Poirier ft. Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi

Ghislain Poirier ft. Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi (Uproot Andy Remix)

Ghislain Poirier ft. Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi (Douster Remix)

There are other remixes then the Uproot Andy and Douster ones but they are not that great. Sorry El Remolon and Lagartijeando (whoever you are), better luck next year. The original is really not that great either but we support the idea. It’s a song about the bad guy in Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom. This guy:

He’s great. Sure, you want ZZK records to shut up when they say:

“Now, South America’s most futuristic record label is expanding its sound, vision, and synchronicity with like-minded producers from around the world, 2010 version. You’ve heard people talking about World Music 2.0, Nu Whirled Music, Global Gettotech and other terms describing where urban bass music is headed. “Las Americas V.1” is your chance to experience it in all its cross-cultural glory.”

Because that is a ridiculous thing to say about a song based on a character in a movie that set back Indian stereotypes to the 1930’s. But it’s still ok because we are getting news and music sent to us from a record label that releases songs we actually play at things like this:

We will try to get promos of these tracks before Daggerday so you guys can get crazy to this shit.

Now you are probably asking “What else has landed in the Walmer inbox?” Well, a few things actually but we will talk of only one group: Urban Legend.

Here is their story in their own words:

The 2 first met in the Ft. Green section of Brooklyn, NY at Moe’s bar. Upon being introduced by super producer Dr. Luke (best known for his work with platinum-plus artists Kelly Clarkson, Pink, Ke$ha, Avril Lavigne), both producers hit it off instantly. It turned out that Kojak thought J-Radical’s new kicks were “dope”. “Ever since I saw him rocking those Air Force 1’s, I knew he was down by law”, quips Kojak. “We had an instant connection,” he adds with a smirk.

The two soon found themselves holed up in J-Radical’s Hollywood studio making tracks until all hours. Both with a penchant for Latinas, the obvious move: “to just be a couple of white boys making a Latino record.”  Since both cats were already making a name for themselves on a solo tip, the natural thing to do was to come together like some rum-soaked Wonder Twins and set out for a musical path of destruction.

Perhaps something in your head is ringing after reading that. Is it an alarm bell? We bet it isn’t from the name dropping of Ke$ha and Avril Lavigne. How could it be? Everyone is buying their music so they must be good. Then we looked at the photos that were sent along with the music and the blurb above:

It puts us in a tough place because we at Walmer Convenience respect the hustle. We hustle everyday. We believe people who work hard should succeed and blah blah blah. This doesn’t work though:

This looks like a thing we would make as a joke. And it doesn’t help that we had to go download this from some website that had pop-ups for downloading stupid screen savers and shit. The Dirty Frenchman may have morning breath so terrible that it has been known to kill the girls that get blackout drunk and sleep with him, but he still posts direct links when he sends his shit out to people.

But what about the music?

Well, if you want to hear it you will have to download it like a sucka from sendspace (?) like we did. The thing is, because the presentation was so poor, we were predisposed to hate a song that would otherwise not be horrible if played when one is coming down off drugs at 6am with the sun rising.

Urban Legend ft Chana – World Keeps Spinning (sendpace)

Anyway, that’s enough of our clout for now.


Right click the picture above and choose “Save as”



The most ambitious, epic, perverted mix yet from Europe’s shame: The Dirty Frenchman.

Here are the tracks:

Mumdance & Brodinski – Eurostarr (Zombie Disco Squad Remix)

Miike Snow– Black & Blue & Enemies (Tiga Remix – Poirier Refix)

Oh Snap!! – Bill Cosby Sweater (Kazey & Bulldog Remix)

Malente & Dex Ft. New Kids – Lions (Douster Remix)

Yolanda Be Cool – Afro Nuts (Douster Remix)

Zombies For Money – Sacanagem

Jusa – African Air Horn Dance

Congorock – Hybro

Major Lazer Ft. Vybz Kartel – Pon De Floor

Dizzee Rascal & Armand Van Helden – Bonkers (Club Mix)

Metronomy – Radio Ladio (Radioclit Swedish Remix)

Amadou & Miriam – Sabali (Uproot Andy Remix)

Douster – King of Africa

Ghislain Poirier Ft. MC Zulu – Go Ballistic (Toddla T & Duckbeats Remix)

Zombies For Money – Numbra One

Silverlink Ft. Badness & Jammer – The Message is Love (Mumdance Remix)

Timberlee – Gunny Gunny (Schlachthofbronx Remix)

Tom Stephan – Turn That Shit Up (Diplo Remix)

Schlachthofbronx – Holdin’ That Dick

Jamtech Foundation Ft. Voltage – Park the 9

Jahdan Blakkamoore – Go Round Payola (Matt Shadetek Bye Haters Rmx)

Ward 21 – Bang Bang

Alcides – Violeta (El Remolon Remix)

Makongo – Makongo




This may not be a new song, but it is a good song. A good song for dancing. A good song for wining (not winning, though you can do that too). Ghislain Poirier is the Quebec kid who can make reggae and soca with the best of them. The Dirty Frenchman thinks that he’s ok because people from Quebec are at least semi-French. This shit will be played at this thing:



All the shit on this blog could be played at that thing. That’s why Diplo said “Walmer are the best djs”. It’s true. Ask him. Approach him next time you are at one of his shows and talk to him about Walmer Convenience. He will know immediate about whom you are referring to. That look of confusion on his face will be because he is astonished that someone had the gall to bring up the few djs that are better than him to his face. He will pretend to not know what you are talking about. He will say “I don’t know who Plan B and The Dirty Frenchman are.” But his eyes will be saying “Why must you bring up those djs who are are the one stain on my life. Even with all this money and all these bitches and a top selling cd of dancehall/electro music with some of the best reggae artists I will alway measure myself against those two and will always come up short.” Yeah, that’s what will be going on in his mind. The next thing you should do is buy him a drink. He will need one.


Major Lazer

Major Lazer

Major Lazer – Hold The Line (zshare)

Yeah, everybody’s talking about Major Lazer this and Major Lazer that. Everyone is looking forward to it coming out. Everyone is like “Ooohh! Aaaahh! I can’t wait to hear what Diplo and Switch and every awesome dancehall artist sounds like!” Well fuck it, so did we but we were gonna pretend like we didn’t. We were gonna stand above the fray. We were gonna look at the hype in the face and punch it in the mouth. That’s what we do at Walmer Convenience. Well this song has been around for a while and yes, it fucking rocks and yes, the album will rock. We will play it a lot. Here are some remixes for your stank asses:

Major Lazer – Hold The Line (Poirier Remix) (zshare)

Major Lazer – Pon De Floor (BeatauCue Remix) (zshare)

Major Lazer – Pon de Floor (Ernold Sane Remix) (zshare)

And as an added bonus we have our old pal Prince Zimboo, captured in video form, freestyling over what we guess will be known henceforth as “hold the line riddim”

There, now that’s out of our system. Get back to your life. Heh.

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