Archive for the ‘ghettotech’ Tag

TAKE THESE SOUNDCLOUDS AND SHOVE THEM IN YOUR ASS   Leave a comment

Hi there, it’s Emilio fucking Estevez. I’d like to talk to you today about fucking soundclouds. I listen to them all the time. They helped me train those Mighty Ducks. I listen to them after I hang with my bro Charles. He’s fucking crazy. He did blow off my head once. He does blow off anything. Trains, chicken, the Statue of Liberty, your mom’s tits. You name it. He does blow off of soundclouds too, these soundclouds that are AFTER THE JUMP:

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CLASS IS NOW IN SESSION: TEACHING SEX ED   1 comment

DON’T FORGET!   Leave a comment

THE REVENGE OF SCHLACHTHOFBRONX   6 comments

Schlachthofbronx – We Run This (zshare)

This song rocks your mom so hard she had a miscarriage. Schlachthofbronx are like “Yeah, we made a song so awesome that you aren’t gonna have a baby brother anymore.” Looks like you’ll still be the favourite. In other news, they have another song out too that kills it an is responsible for a shitty video:

Not even good shitty. But good song.

IF STO HAS SEX TODAY IT WILL BE BIRTHDAY SEX   Leave a comment

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Birthday sex. That sex that can only happen to you one day a year. Like a beautiful sunrise on the Mediterranean or the smell of a new car, birthday sex is a thing of  ephemeral beauty. It can also be sloppy and drunk. Today is Sto’s birthday sex day and as a tribute to a great man it is fitting to display some of his most noted anthems from the past years. It is hoped that by knowing these songs you may get to know Sto better in a sense. Enter the door that leads to his world…

Elephant Man – Jiggy Body (zshare)

Elephant Man is one of Sto’s favourite dancehall artists of all time. He is one of Walmer’s and you can tell it by the amount of times we have written about him. Try it. Look up all the times if you don’t believe us. Did you do it? Good. Now you know. This song is like a shitty club in Pickering or Mississauga song but it still is awesome. Sometimes those shitty clubs are the best time ever. In fact, it is rare that we have had a bad time at any of them. No motherfuckin pretensions. Just a bunch of drunk people looking to fuck and have fun. Maybe they are looking for birthday sex.

Crookers – Knobbers (zshare)

This one is another Sto favourite and is one of Crookers’ best they ever made. If you listen to this, the Salmon Dance remix, the Dirty Basement remix and the Gatas Gatas Gatas remix you have heard all the best of Crookers. This is another Sto favourite of Crookers. We talk about Crookers a lot on here even though we shouldn’t because if you have heard their new song with Kardinal Offishal you would know that right now they have chosen a shitty path. PS: Big Money Comin’ is also a great song they did. Look it up. Go to school.

Lexxus – Ring Up Me Cellie (zshare)

We are not sure if this is one of Sto’s favourites but he better not have a problem with having his name attached to one of  the best dancehall tracks of all time. If you don’t know this song and you say you like dancehall then you should feel insecure right now. You need to take that bass out of your voice son.

Dj Assault – No Vaseline (zshare)

This is what Sto would call a “christmas song”. From what we understand that means the song has a joyous feeling to it. Obviously the lyrics don’t count because this is about here we go, beat that ho. What is amazing about this song is it uses the music from the show Jeopardy to talk about beating that ho. We know that when you watch Jeopardy and you here the music you are thinking of beating a ho. It just the thing that happens in a person’s mind when they here it. It’s normal. You’re normal.

If you want to hear some other Sto classics check out this and this and this and go to this:

BADMAN BIRTHDAY

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