Archive for the ‘freaky phillip’ Tag

WEDNESDAY MOOMBAHTON PLUNDER & BUGGERY   1 comment

You took fucking drugs. You went to a museum. You couldn’t understand what the fuck was going on. You threw up everywhere. Everyone was pissed. They banned you from the museum for life. Now you can’t get fucking art smart. You walked down the fucking street. You slipped on a piece of runny dog shit. You twisted your fucking ankle. while you were on the ground crying like a bitch you saw a place. It was another museum. A moombahton museum. You went inside. You heard these fucking tracks that are AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP ASSCLOWNS!

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SUPER FUCKING SOUNDCLOUD TUESDAY?   Leave a comment

Yo! Super cool time fuckers. This is Ibiza. This is life. Feel the music. I’m Dj Tiesto. Dj stands for “disc jockey”. Did you know that? It’s a a fucking rave. This is Ibiza. Feel the life. It’s a Tuesday. People are fucking connecting. They have MDMA sex. The next day they are like “What did I fuck?” That’s so Ibiza. That’s so Tiesto. My music is like crying into a pool of dreams. When people shit in Ibiza, they shit love. Literally fucking hearts come out of their assholes. It looks like Valentine’s Day all over the beach. I’m over here now:

The worst thing about the daytime is that you can’t use glow sticks. What could annoying people make use of to give light shows? Dark sticks? Like they would fucking make shit darker around them and it would be called a dark show and also sound mildly racist? All this thinking is killing the fucking vibe. That’s not what Ibiza is about. The only thing you worry about here is herpes and where you get the next line of blow. And over here you always do blow off of girls tits. It’s the law. Here are some tunes to stick up your mom’s vagina. Use them wisely. Feel the fucking energy of the dance. Become Ibiza. TUNES ARE AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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MOOMBAHCLOUDS OF FUCK AND OTHER DRUGS   Leave a comment

Hey bros! How many drinks have you had today? 2? 3? 15? The world is your oyster. How many times have you puked? 1? 3? It’s true. It’s the best way to feel good again after you start feeling a little woozy from drinking. The Dirty Frenchman worked with this dude who got fired for drinking at work. The guy would drink booze to work at a call centre and it’s like if you’re gonna get boozy than get boozy to do some fucking fun work like being a fucking bikini inspector or condom tester or a sex haver or secret shopper at Walmart. A lot of moombah again on the plate today. Don’t know what we’re gonna do with it all. Been eating a lot of moombah lately. Maybe too much. Gonna get mad fat and have to have that moombah removed by liposuction. MUSIC IS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

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THIS FRIDAY FUCKERS!   Leave a comment

Hey bitches! What the fuck are you doing today? If you are in Canada then you should fucking vote because it’s super cool to do it! Like, only the most awesome swaggerrific people vote and that’s who you are. Right? That totally got you fucking motivated to vote. Anyway. That wasn’t even the fucking point of this post. We are just taken in by the magic of the political process. No. The point is to go to our Walm-Art event at the Port Gallery this Friday. Gonna be some amazing artwork and some fantastic music.

CLICK HERE TO ATTEND SIRS AND FUCKING MADAMS

Now, what music was made by fuckers recently? Maybe you will find some AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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