Archive for the ‘frank lucano’ Tag

EXCLUSIVE TRACK! FRANK LUCANO – SWAGGA DAGGA   Leave a comment

In Canada right now it’s morning and if you hate coffee you’re in fucking luck. This new track that Frank Lucano has sent us for exclusive download is your coffee substitute. You wanna feel ready to start the party at 9am? Listen to this track. Maybe it is best described as your morning cocaine. Frank Lucano sent us heat before but this is even better. We love anything that is fucking dancehall based. All the things you need are here: Elephant Man, soca-ish beat and the swagga dagga riddim. GO GRAB THIS EXCLUSIVE TRACK AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP AND BUMP IT AT WORK UNTIL YOU GET FUCKING FIRED!

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Posted December 22, 2011 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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LATE BREAKING NEWS   Leave a comment

Hey cuntfuckers! We got two fucking stories we are working on.

#1 – New fucking free moombah track from Smash & Grab

#2 – New EP from Frank Lucano

CLICK AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP TO GET THE NEWS ASSWIPES!

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EXCLUSIVE DOWNLOAD – FRANK LUCANO   5 comments

Hey assfuckers! Fucking bass and fucking dancehall combine together in this fucking track by Frank Lucano out of Italy. That’s a picture of him. He looks normal. He takes Collie Buddz’s “Come Around” and turns it into a song that dudes can grind their dick on a girl’s ass to. Can you feel the intensity? No? Do some blow. Now can you feel it? Good. GRAB THE DOWNLOAD AND SAMPLE IT AFTER THE JUMP!

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Posted August 2, 2011 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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SUPER FUCKING SOUNDCLOUD TUESDAY?   Leave a comment

Yo! Super cool time fuckers. This is Ibiza. This is life. Feel the music. I’m Dj Tiesto. Dj stands for “disc jockey”. Did you know that? It’s a a fucking rave. This is Ibiza. Feel the life. It’s a Tuesday. People are fucking connecting. They have MDMA sex. The next day they are like “What did I fuck?” That’s so Ibiza. That’s so Tiesto. My music is like crying into a pool of dreams. When people shit in Ibiza, they shit love. Literally fucking hearts come out of their assholes. It looks like Valentine’s Day all over the beach. I’m over here now:

The worst thing about the daytime is that you can’t use glow sticks. What could annoying people make use of to give light shows? Dark sticks? Like they would fucking make shit darker around them and it would be called a dark show and also sound mildly racist? All this thinking is killing the fucking vibe. That’s not what Ibiza is about. The only thing you worry about here is herpes and where you get the next line of blow. And over here you always do blow off of girls tits. It’s the law. Here are some tunes to stick up your mom’s vagina. Use them wisely. Feel the fucking energy of the dance. Become Ibiza. TUNES ARE AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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DID YOU GO TO THE PARTY LAST NIGHT?   1 comment

Did you know that when you put your ear up against a Grammy award you can hear the sound of money being printed? Oh hi. Didn’t see you there. I’m David Oswald Guetta. Did you make it to the party last night? It was fucked. There was blow everywhere. It was as if the party was held in a snow globe. A snow globe that gets you high. It was crazy.


There was like some astro-space black dude there who djed with me called Bill-I-Am and he is from a place called Black Iced Peace. He is a pretty cool for an alien. He did the most blow of all of us. What a champ. We didn’t play any of these songs that are posted AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP! We just listened Sean Kingston sing all of Justin Bieber’s songs while Fergie shot ping pong balls out of her asshole and pussy at the same time.

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MEDIOCRE SOUNDCLOUD WEDNESDAY   Leave a comment

Listen cunts and cuntettes. when we call this Wednesday mediocre, it’s not because the tracks are mediocre, no, they are quite fucking sick. It’s mediocre because we ain’t got that much shit to post. We fucking failed. We couldn’t find enough music. We will have to quit our jobs blogging that we do for free and collect imaginary welfare. It’s possible. Anyway, there is a lot of moombah that’s been coming out of your mom’s fucking pussy as of late and so get ready for a moombah fest and if you don’t like it you could just do a line of blow and then go jump in a lake. Tunage AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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