Archive for the ‘el remolon’ Tag


Is there a thing as too much bass? Is there a thing as too much face? Maybe. This is world with a million Nicholas Cages just running around in a cage. What does that mean? Nothing. It means mostly that we don’t know what the fuck to write right now. We complain a lot about entertaining you fucks. IT IS SO HARD TO PLEASE YOU! Let’s fucking say that this post is just gonna be for bass music (we’ve complained about this before, all music has bass) and then we’ll do a fucking moombahton post for your fucking pleasure. You would like that no? If not go read a fucking blog about feelings. If you want to have your own fun with Nick Cage’s fucking head go here. OTHERWISE GO GRAB SOME BASS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!:

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Hey you fucking monarchists! Time to put your listening hats on and maybe your dancing hats and listen to these mixtapes from some icons of bass music. Who are they? What do they want? NO SPOILERS! Just dive the fuck in. These guys will teach you how to dj. Not as well as we would but we can’t dj everyday at all times. GO GRAB EM AFTER THE JUMP ASSMUNCHERS!

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THE AVATAR 2 TRAILER IS OUT!   Leave a comment

Are you guys getting excited yet! Looks like this one is gonna be even crazier than the first with a whole new cast of characters that will surely become classic. What do you guys think about the casting choices? Are people fans of the new updated costumes?


We don’t know why we call this “Super Soundcloud Wednesday”. We post soundclouds all the time. Nothing special there. But we still call it that. So get used to it. Life is best if you don’t ask questions. Life is best if you shut up. But keep your ears open because sometimes you might hear some good fucking music. Or maybe you won’t. Maybe you hate all the stuff we post and you make sure to visit our blog everyday to be like “look at this crap, these guys are stupid cunt motherfuckers that like garbage tunes from shitonia”. Well thanks for boosting our traffic. MUSIC IS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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This is our hot tub!

This is our drink sponsor!

This is our mothafuckin’ boat!

Why? Because we have moderate clout bitches!

So what has landed in our inbox recently? A lot.

First, direct your attention here. Did you read that? Did you see that Walmer Convenience was cited at ZZK Records? This is proof our opinion matters. Matters a moderate amount. People are like “Well if Walmer Convenience thinks they are the best then it must be true”. It just makes sense. Use a calculator if you need to check the math.

Furthermore we have received new news from ZZK twice since. Count it! 1, 2. Finished! Firstly there is a new EP from Fauna with a remix by the unstoppable Douster of the song Gauchito Gil that we have already featured on the blog in it’s original form. This is what it sounds like:

Plus they are going on a Northern Hemisphere tour! Sure the website looks like it dates from 1996 but the news is good. Will they be bringing Douster, Fauna and El Remolon to Toronto? They better. We only have moderate clout so someone else get on that. Stat! This is their email:

What else? El Remelon has a new mixtape. This is the direct link. This is the tracklist:

1.El Remolón vs Sinead O´Connor – Jah Nuh Dead
2.El Remolón – Mujeres vs Daft Punk
3.Junior Boys vs Ladybox – Tick Tock (El Remolón cumbia mashup)
4.El Remolón feat Fantasma vs Lady Gaga – Love Game
5.Los Pibes Chorros vs El Remolón Jam
6.Un Mono Azul feat Lido Pimienta – Ninfa de la mar (El Remolón mix)
7.El Remolón feat Fantasma – Liga del Sabor Digital
8.Ghislain Poirier feat Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi (El Remolón Remix)
9.El Remolón feat Marina vs Sokio – Vem Que Tem (edit)
10.Los Pericos – Me Late (El Remolón Remix)
11.El Remolón vs Dante – Listo Pa Gozar el Mostro
12.El Remolón feat Boogat – Estilo Acapulco
13.Bomba Stereo – Fuego (El Remolón Remix)
14.El Remolón vs Maluca – El Tigeraso (Cumbiastep Mix)
15.El Remolón feat Lido Pimienta – Basta Ya (Dubstep Mix)

It’s a chilled out mix in the cumbia style. Good to get really high to. Smoke tons of weed for it. Dreamy shit.

Well, that’s enough of us being the official ZZK Records Toronto news service. What else is there to talk about? Well the good sports at Low Life Inc have sent us a bunch of stuff. Like this by B.R.U.C.E. or these cool cats:

B.R.U.C.E. – The Wallet (direct link)

Don’t they look jazzy? This is not our cup of tea. But Low Life Inc likes to challenge us. The above song would be good for playing at the Comfort Zone. Toronto people know what we are talking about. It kinda drones on and if you were on three MDMAs you might find happiness in it. This guy knows what we’re talking about:

Next we got dubstep from them by Meesha who is a man with a girl’s name and is sad and just wants to get good reception for his TV:

This is progress for Low Life Inc though on two counts:

1. We have posted dubstep here before so it is not like they are sending us something that is completely not from any style that we like.

2. Meesha is from Toronto and we like repping local peeps. Unless they are douches. Is Meesha a douche? Maybe.

This is his song:

Meesha – Daat (direct link)

It’s an ok song at best. It seems like he’s trying to go all Joy Orbison on our asses. The Bombaman remix is better:

Meesha – Daat (Bombaman Remix) (direct link)

It has more ambiance. Like a sunset in Paris where people are hitting each other with two by fours and birds are robots.

Well that is all for now. Keep sending us music. We don’t always like it and we’re kind of assholes but Walmer gives it to you real. This is a grown man’s game.

WE HAVE MODERATE CLOUT VOL 3   Leave a comment

This is our private jet:

This is the laptop we use to spin:

This the car we use to take ladies home:


This time it’s a mixed bag. We have some crazy pum pum activation shit and some mediocre we don’t know what to think of it shit.

First the good news:

ZZK Records aka the best damn label from South America sent us this news:

BUENOS AIRES, ARG. (Feb. 16, 2010) – “Las Americas V.1,” the latest EP from Buenos Aires-based record label ZZK Records, is set for digital release next Tuesday, February 16. Produced by Poirier, a DJ/producer from Montreal, “Las Americas” features a reggaeton-inspired track with vocals by Boogat. The album, which also includes remixes from Uproot Andy, El Remolon, Lagartijeando, and Douster, is sure to unite Montreal and Buenos Aires as hermanos in music.

Here are the tracks to preview:

Ghislain Poirier ft. Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi

Ghislain Poirier ft. Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi (Uproot Andy Remix)

Ghislain Poirier ft. Boogat – Kalima Shop Titi (Douster Remix)

There are other remixes then the Uproot Andy and Douster ones but they are not that great. Sorry El Remolon and Lagartijeando (whoever you are), better luck next year. The original is really not that great either but we support the idea. It’s a song about the bad guy in Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom. This guy:

He’s great. Sure, you want ZZK records to shut up when they say:

“Now, South America’s most futuristic record label is expanding its sound, vision, and synchronicity with like-minded producers from around the world, 2010 version. You’ve heard people talking about World Music 2.0, Nu Whirled Music, Global Gettotech and other terms describing where urban bass music is headed. “Las Americas V.1” is your chance to experience it in all its cross-cultural glory.”

Because that is a ridiculous thing to say about a song based on a character in a movie that set back Indian stereotypes to the 1930’s. But it’s still ok because we are getting news and music sent to us from a record label that releases songs we actually play at things like this:

We will try to get promos of these tracks before Daggerday so you guys can get crazy to this shit.

Now you are probably asking “What else has landed in the Walmer inbox?” Well, a few things actually but we will talk of only one group: Urban Legend.

Here is their story in their own words:

The 2 first met in the Ft. Green section of Brooklyn, NY at Moe’s bar. Upon being introduced by super producer Dr. Luke (best known for his work with platinum-plus artists Kelly Clarkson, Pink, Ke$ha, Avril Lavigne), both producers hit it off instantly. It turned out that Kojak thought J-Radical’s new kicks were “dope”. “Ever since I saw him rocking those Air Force 1’s, I knew he was down by law”, quips Kojak. “We had an instant connection,” he adds with a smirk.

The two soon found themselves holed up in J-Radical’s Hollywood studio making tracks until all hours. Both with a penchant for Latinas, the obvious move: “to just be a couple of white boys making a Latino record.”  Since both cats were already making a name for themselves on a solo tip, the natural thing to do was to come together like some rum-soaked Wonder Twins and set out for a musical path of destruction.

Perhaps something in your head is ringing after reading that. Is it an alarm bell? We bet it isn’t from the name dropping of Ke$ha and Avril Lavigne. How could it be? Everyone is buying their music so they must be good. Then we looked at the photos that were sent along with the music and the blurb above:

It puts us in a tough place because we at Walmer Convenience respect the hustle. We hustle everyday. We believe people who work hard should succeed and blah blah blah. This doesn’t work though:

This looks like a thing we would make as a joke. And it doesn’t help that we had to go download this from some website that had pop-ups for downloading stupid screen savers and shit. The Dirty Frenchman may have morning breath so terrible that it has been known to kill the girls that get blackout drunk and sleep with him, but he still posts direct links when he sends his shit out to people.

But what about the music?

Well, if you want to hear it you will have to download it like a sucka from sendspace (?) like we did. The thing is, because the presentation was so poor, we were predisposed to hate a song that would otherwise not be horrible if played when one is coming down off drugs at 6am with the sun rising.

Urban Legend ft Chana – World Keeps Spinning (sendpace)

Anyway, that’s enough of our clout for now.



This is the reggaeton song that will play when your plane crashes in the Arctic and you are scrambling to do anything you can before you die of exposure. Yes. Usually we are all about party time at Walmer but this is a nice little change. It’s ok to be serious sometimes.  It’s ok to wear glasses and talk about the economy. You can do anything you want in life. You can crash your plane in the arctic and die of exposure. Your destiny is in your hands. El Remolon rocks. He released a free album of b-sides on the ZZK website recently. You can find this track and others there.

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