Archive for the ‘duck sauce’ Tag


Chris Tucker woke up in his apartment in the not great part of town. It was 1pm. That’s the time he woke up everyday. He hadn’t worked for 2 years so he never had to get up early unless it was to get his welfare cheque. Chris Tucker collected welfare now. Even though he always got more than enough sleep because of the fact that nothing was going on in his life, he still enjoyed having a cup of coffee as a pick me up to start his day. It just made it feel complete. It made him feel complete if only for a few minutes. As the coffee brewed he looked at the fading picture of him and Jackie Chan that he had stuck on his old refrigerator.

Those had been better times. He remembered all the bitches he had fucked as a tag team with Jackie. They had done it to build up their partnership so that audiences would love their chemistry. He remembered all the blow that they had done together in the trailer off of breasts in between takes. Jackie liked to do lines of blow between girl’s assholes and pussies. He called it “Getting from Point A to Point P” except when he said it it was in Chinese and shit. Chris Tucker stood there for 10 more minutes looking at the picture,  revisiting all the highs and lows he had had in his former career as an actor. The coffee maker made a beep and brought Chris Tucker back to reality. He poured the warm liquid into his favourite mug and took a quick gulp. As the coffee hit his taste buds it was all wrong, it had a very sharp taste almost like vinegar but salty and it stung his tongue. He pulled the mug away from his face and looked inside and made a startling discovery. It was not coffee at all in his mug. It was pee. Chris Tucker had just drank pee. Floating in the pee were soundclouds. GO GRAB THOSE SOUNDCLOUDS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP TO KNOW WHAT CHRIS TUCKER EXPERIENCED!:

Read the rest of this entry »


Here the fuck it is! FUCKMATAZZ VOL II: MOOMBAHFUCK or THE FUCKET LIST. TAKE YOUR PICK! It can be what you want it to be. One thing that it is is proof that Walmer Convenience murders moombahton like your mom murdered your dad and then told you that he left you because he doesn’t love you. We were one of the first blogs to break moombahton when that scrappy adolescent known as Munchi was still emailing people asking them to listen to his shit (happy recovery buddy). You can tweet about moombahton all you like. You can have a moombahton night and act like your are the most moombahtoniest in your city (Toronto) but you will never play it like Walmer. Mix and tracklist after THE MOTHERFUCKIN JUMP…

Read the rest of this entry »

DISCO MOOMBAHTON   Leave a comment

Duck Sauce – Barbara Streisand (Emynd Remix) (mediafire)

Yo idiots! Check it! Emynd made some moombahton. Everyone is making moombahton. Even Diplo featured moombahton (and in particular Munchi) on his blog. Sorry Diplo. Too late. We broke the news first. You are behind on the times. Go to jail. Do not collect $200 for jumping on another genre and using your clout to do some crazy shit with it. Walmer will be kings of moombahton. You will see. You can hear us spin it at this thing:

Facebook it bitches!

%d bloggers like this: