Archive for the ‘dubbel dutch’ Tag

THE RETURN OF SOUNDCLOUDS   2 comments

Hey bitch suckers. What the fuck is going the fuck on? What the fuck has gone wrong with this place? Are we some kind of legitimate blog or something that posts actual releases by fuckers instead of just a fucking bunch of soundclouds with swearing and stills from stupid 1980’s films? NO! We are not. We are just a bunch of fucking hacks who don’t do any fucking analysis and say stupid shit and generally bring down the ART and SCIENCE of musical blogging. Music blogging is obviously the most noble of mostly unpaid professions. Anyway. Let’s just stop talking about that stuff and focus instead on music and your mom’s pussy. The most important things. LET’S FUCKING DO THIS AFTER THE JUMP CUNT LICKERS!

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AFTER THE FIRE THERE ARE ONLY ASHES   Leave a comment

Here’s a picture of those fucking Gooffee fucks tearing shit down at the FIRE SALE party we did on Saturday. Here’s that motherfucker Max Le Daron:

Yeah sure it’s a fucking Tuesday so we’ve had some time to recover but our heads still feel like rocks are inside. Thanks to these fucks for making the party amazing as fuck. How about we go grab some tunes and have ourselves a fucking time at our respective workplaces being tired and pretending to work but really looking at blogs. GO GRAB THAT SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!:

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SOUNDCLOUDS JUST WASHED UP ON THE FUCKING SHORE   Leave a comment

After the Japan nuclear crisis all these radioactive soundclouds started washing up in your mom’s vagina and polluting the delicate ecosystem contained therein. You tried to do all you could during the cleanup: you gizzed into the water, you smoked cigarettes and ashed into it, you even poured bleach in it to get rid of the stains but nothing worked. There is no more hope and now you just have to make do with the new reality. Music is AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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YOU DON’T WEAR A T-SHIRT LIKE THIS. IT WEARS YOU.   1 comment

Ladies and gentlemen this right here is the Cadillac of t-shirts. If you grew up in the ghetto, spent your time doing all you could to be the best at basketball, got drafted to the NBA right out of high school and got offered $50 million before you turned 20 years old then this is the shirt that you wear. You don’t wear this shirt if you’re the fucking manager at Burger King not even if you’re the manager at KFC which is slightly more prestigious (face the truth Burger King). No sir. This shirt says “I made it”. Be somebody AFTER THE JUMP!…

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SOUNDCLOUDS FOR KIDS!   Leave a comment

Hey bros! Do you like pogs? We don’t because we’re adults. But maybe you are a child. What are you doing here? Your parents have really dropped the ball if you are here. They’re like “We don’t fuckin’ care. Look at whatever you want. What would you like to drink? Vodka? Beer?”. You’re pretty cool kids though if that is what you are. Maybe in a few years you can be like French Fries here. Seems like just yesterday he was coming out of his mom’s vagina and now look at him: killing a crowd in Toronto in a Chinese restaurant. Good to the Mansions and the Earmilks for having him come down and play the music even though he was ill. The Dirty Frenchman got so drunk he couldn’t fucking eat until 8pm the next day. You could live that life one day kids. MUSIC AFTER THAT JUMP YOU CUNTS!…

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IN TORONTO? JUST GO TO THIS TOMORROW FUCKERS   Leave a comment

We will be puking our guts out at this one. Buy you tickets here. Dubbel Dutch and our boys Schlachthofbronx are stone cold musical killers. $15 gets you a one way ticket to fuck mountain. Say that you’ll be there the only acceptable way, by clicking attending on Facebook.

good to go

IS THAT SONG DOWNLOADABLE HERE?

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING DOWN IN TORONTO ON SATURDAY MARCH 26?   2 comments

Listen fucknuts. Here’s the deal: one of our favourite electronic groups of the last few years is coming to Toronto. Who are they? Schlachthofbronx. What do they do? They serve up bass like Japan serves up nuclear disasters. They go big. Too soon or not soon enough? You be the judge. Anyway, they are coming to fucking Toronto with Dubbel Dutch this Saturday. If you live in or are gonna be anywhere around Toronto that day then it is your duty to go to this show. We are not even involved with this show and we are telling you to go. We’re actually pretty jealous of those Plugged Not Thugged assholes for getting them and have often joked that we should make a Thugged Not Plugged party as a joke. For just this moment however, we will put down our weapons and unite together like the all the countries in the world did in the smash 1996 hit Independence Day. We still have the best blog in Toronto and are the best djs. That will never change.

BUY THE TICKETS HERE FUCKERS!

$15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15 $15

Not convinced by our self-interested selflessness? Then click after the jump for ALL THE BEST SHIT THAT SCHLACHTHOFBRONX HAS MADE! (obviously not all for download you assholes)

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HEY GUYS, JUST CHILL AND LISTEN TO SOME MUSIC   1 comment

All of you need to chill. Stop puttin that fuckin crack in your cornflakes. Enjoy the music of life. Drink wine in a park in the springtime. Throw up in a casual, relaxed way. For example, you could keep your hands in your pockets while you throw up. You’re like “I think puking in a bathroom or acting embarrassed about my puke is too formal and stuffy.” Oh and by the way we don’t always have to write some clever ass post for y’all as if that is al we have to do in life. Life. Music:

Yolanda Be Cool – Villalobos For Presidente (Dubbel Dutch Remix)

Lay It Down (Emynd Booty Bass Remix)

King Kong – Drive By (Original Mix)

Nintendo – Super Mario Theme (Artistic Raw Remix)

Sajna De Vehre (NEKI STRANAC Moombhangra Rework) – Shukshinder Shinda vs.Stas Relide vs.David Guetta

THE NEW DIRTY FRENCHMAN MIX: FUCKMATAZZ VOLUME 1   2 comments

Here it fucking is, a new mix from The Dirty Frenchman. This one is a mix of everything. You asked for dubstep? Well, it’s already in the bedroom with your mamma. You want kuduro? It’s drinkin’ the milk right out of the carton from your fridge. You wanted hip hop? It took money out of your wallet and then asked you if they could borrow it. And we got all that shit in between. We got some Walmer heroes represented on  here. Crizzly is in between Kanye and Trey Songz where he belongs. Emynd is there. We got Gooffee up in this bitch. Munchi had to be in this. Bump that shit:

Tracklist:

Ciara – Deuces (Dubbel Dutch Remix)
Munchi – Minigame
Girl Unit – Wut
Kanye West – All of the Lights
Crizzly – Big Booty Bitchezz
Trey Songz – Bottoms Up (Emynd Atlanta Bass Remix)
Gucci Mane – Lemonade (Heroes & Villains Remix)
Baby Blondy – Me Tienen Dema
Three 6 Mafia & Project Pat – Keep My Name Out Ya Mouth (Bird Peterson Remix)
Gooffee – Jack Daniels
Busy Signal – Real Gallis
Salem – King Night

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