Archive for the ‘drumstep’ Tag

WEEKEND PARTY TIME FUCKFEST   Leave a comment

These people are fucking partying, who are they partying to? US FUCKERS! That’s who. We demolished 751 on Saturday like your dad demolished your mom and inpregnated her with you. That’s how we roll. At points bitches were dancing on tables and shit. Do we have photos of that? No. Are we lying then? You’ll never know. Whatever, we took a bunch of shitty pics. GO GRAB SOME FUCKING TUNES AFTER THE JUMP AND CHECK CRAPPY PICS OF THE BAD TASTE JAM! BIG UP STEVE ROCK OF THE GOOD KIDS FOR HAVING US!

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GLOBAL BASS ORGY: ALL BASS, NO MOOMBAH   Leave a comment

Hey everyone! This is just a shitty fucking picture taken in a drunken and drugged out stupor on some fucking night that we were out about town and shit. Probably more than one person puked that night probably more than once. THAT’S THE SWAG LIFE! WE PUKE MOET MOTHERFUCKERS! WE SHIT LOBSTER! That’s the Walmer life. We excrete class. Y’all can’t keep up with that. Anyway. This one is all about no moombahton. We just reppin bass music up in this bitch. GO GRAB THAT BASS MUSIC! WE WILL NEVER FUCKING ANALYSE THE TRACKS WE POST! WE JUST GONNA DUMP THAT SHIT ON YOUR HEAD! TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT! GRAB IT AFTER THE JUMP!

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MONDAY MUSIC FOR MOTHERFUCKERS   Leave a comment

Who’s computer is this? It’s fucking Noms’! Do you know this dude? No? Check the fuck outta his shit here! He is quite talented and has been producing for less than a year. His Gucci Mane juke song is just pure heat. Wear oven mits when you listen to that shit. Been a few days since we posted. Been busy as fuck partying and spinning so what are you gonna do hate us for living? Fuck. How about we just ut the crap and listen to some tunes. Wanna rep Walmer too? get at us. LET’S GO GRAB SOME HOT ASS TUNES AFTER THE JUMP! THERE HAVE BEEN TOO MANY!

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POST APOCALYPTIC BASS: NO MOOMBAH FUCKERS   Leave a comment

After the fucking apocalypse there will be no room for moombahton. No light-hearted fun at the end of the world. We will need bass and plenty of it. People who listen to moombahton after the apolcalypse will be moving too slow. Cannibals will easily catch up with them. People who are listening to bass may be moving even slower. But they will be heavily armed with axes and hammers. People who listen to moombahton will be armed with hugs. You can’t kill a person with hugs unless you are some kind of musclebound bohemoth. There are probably like 3 people in the world that like moombahton and are also musclebound bohemoths. They will be the only people to carry the moombahton torch into the future. They still might get fucking killed by a bunch of people who like bass music if those people gang up on them. HERE’S SOME BASS MUSIC TO BE PREPARED AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

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NEW YEAR/NEW BASS   Leave a comment

Don’t know what the fuck that picture is supposed to be. Like is it the Moon hitting the Earth or is it like Uranus? Is that how it ends? We are hit by Uranus? Your anus? Fuck. Or maybe nothing will happen. Maybe you will still have to work at your dead end job for the next 20 years. Maybe there will be no end. You will still be single in 2012. Did you ever imagine that there would be an apocalypse and society would crumble and that you wouldn’t have to go to fucking work and maybe you would join some rebel group and be a hero/finally step up your game? It might never happen. You may not become some kind of post-apocalyptic fuckmaster/hero.

In the meantime why don’t we go out and grab some fucking bass music and remember the peeps we lost in 2011. LET’S GO FUCKING DO THIS SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!

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BASS MUSIC FOR CREEPS   Leave a comment

Where do you listen to music? The girl’s bathroom? The school playground? You’re a creep. Even if you’re a girl it’s kinda creepy unless you have a kid and the kid is playing on the playground and you happen to be there to look after the little fucker. But then even if that is the case, why do you have your headphones on? Maybe your kid is screaming. You’ll never hear them. You’re a bad mother. This is not Parenting Today. Is there a blog called Parenting Today? Who cares. Fuckers are here for some fucking tunes so why don’t we drop the pretense and get straight to the point. Just straight up bass music for your stupid asses. GO GRAB THOSE TUNES AFTER THE JUMP FUCK FACES!

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BASSKETBALL   Leave a comment

The Dirty Fucking Fremchman never saw Baseketball. He was probably readings books like a bitch. You hear that kids? Only bitches read books. Don’t read. Don’t stand out by being smart. No one likes smart people. In a sense, being smart is stupid. Make that your slogan. Anyway. There has been so much shit coming out music wise that we can’t keep the fuck up. Also we like to drink. If you drink you feel like fucking puking. If you feel like fucking puking it’s hard to be funny. That’s our life. WHY DON’T YOU GO GRAB SOME FUCKING TRACKS FOR THE FUCKING WEEKEND WHILE WE CHUG WATER AND MUNCH ADVILS!

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SOUNDCLOUDS MADE FROM PEE   Leave a comment

Chris Tucker woke up in his apartment in the not great part of town. It was 1pm. That’s the time he woke up everyday. He hadn’t worked for 2 years so he never had to get up early unless it was to get his welfare cheque. Chris Tucker collected welfare now. Even though he always got more than enough sleep because of the fact that nothing was going on in his life, he still enjoyed having a cup of coffee as a pick me up to start his day. It just made it feel complete. It made him feel complete if only for a few minutes. As the coffee brewed he looked at the fading picture of him and Jackie Chan that he had stuck on his old refrigerator.

Those had been better times. He remembered all the bitches he had fucked as a tag team with Jackie. They had done it to build up their partnership so that audiences would love their chemistry. He remembered all the blow that they had done together in the trailer off of breasts in between takes. Jackie liked to do lines of blow between girl’s assholes and pussies. He called it “Getting from Point A to Point P” except when he said it it was in Chinese and shit. Chris Tucker stood there for 10 more minutes looking at the picture,  revisiting all the highs and lows he had had in his former career as an actor. The coffee maker made a beep and brought Chris Tucker back to reality. He poured the warm liquid into his favourite mug and took a quick gulp. As the coffee hit his taste buds it was all wrong, it had a very sharp taste almost like vinegar but salty and it stung his tongue. He pulled the mug away from his face and looked inside and made a startling discovery. It was not coffee at all in his mug. It was pee. Chris Tucker had just drank pee. Floating in the pee were soundclouds. GO GRAB THOSE SOUNDCLOUDS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP TO KNOW WHAT CHRIS TUCKER EXPERIENCED!:

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NEW FUCKING MUSIC TO MAKE YOU COOL   1 comment

You all want to be cool. All of you fuckers. Admit it. Even if you say you don’t care about being cool it’s just so that you can look cool. You can’t escape. So if that’s your fucking goal than why don’t we watch this video from Malcolm Jamal Warner of TV’s the Cosby Show. You will definitely be fucking cool if you do these things. Especially if you are an adult.

Alright now we’re totally fucking ready to take on the world!

But now that you have this new swag, you need some good tunes to go with it. GO GRAB THOSE FUCKING TUNES AFTER THE JUMP FUCKERS!

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SOUNDCLOUDS AS GOOD AS FUCKING GOLD!   Leave a comment

Do you love fucking gold? Do you fucking only drink Goldschlager and wear gold shoes like this?:

Sometimes music can be worth more than gold. Mostly it is not. It’s way fucking better to have more gold than music. You can say the opposite but you’re wrong. Why the fuck are there fuckers in every town with ads on TV telling you to sell you gold to them. No one makes ads for selling them fucking music. “WE BUY YOUR OLD BROKEN MUSIC! TRADE MUSIC FOR CA$H!”. That never happens. So why don’t we go and listen to very affordably priced music AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP ASSHOLES!

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