Archive for the ‘diplo’ Tag

THE DIARY OF METTA WORLD PEACE   Leave a comment

Hey Hey! How the fuck are you? Just gonna take a break from dancing with stars. My name is Ron Art-wait no, that’s wrong I’m Metta World Peace. That’s what people call me now. Here’s proof:

I’ve always been fucking believing in the world peace and all and loving the people and having a positive vibe in this hustle. I’m not a fucking athlete anymore. I’m a fucking artist. I paint portraits with words now in the genre of raping, I mean rapping. I put out a rape mixtape. I mean a rap mixtape. Fuck. Have you tried it?

(click the picture to actually download this thing)

My most happiest thing about the mixtape is that it features my two fucking idols: George Lopez & Fat Joe. One is the fucking Picasso of comedy and the other is the Shakespeare of rap. I know that it seems crazy to compare George Lopez to Shakespeare and Picasso to Fat Joe but that’s just the way I fucking see it with my artist eyes. My artest eyes. Haha. Floetry. Check out my video with my mentors:

Call a fucking museum to get this shit put in it. Anyway. People get their inspiration from a lot of places. I get mine from all the fuck over. I get inspiration even from the soundclouds. I love them. Let’s go fucking listen to that shit. LET’S DO IT AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP FUCKERS!

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MURDERCLOUDS   Leave a comment


Why did we post this building. It looks kinda crazy. We don’t know where the fuck it is or what the fuck it is. Do you live in this? If you live here it looks like you would have to be some kind of sinister motherfucker plotting shit and eye fucking women on a regular and hurting animals and shit and generally being a fucking creep. That’s your life. You just sit in a high backed chair all fucking day. Don’t know why but you fucking do. Anyway LET’S GO GRAB SOME FUCKING SOUNDCLOUDS AFTER THE JUMP!

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BIG SOUNDCLOUDS IN LITTLE CHINA   Leave a comment

Enchanté! Karl Lagerfeld taught me that that’s how motherfuckers say “Hi” in Germany. Crazy eh? By the way, I’m noted American thespian Curtis James Jackson III. Hahaha! Friends, Romans, Countrymen! Lend me your ears! That’s acting! That’s how you do it! I live in fucking Connecticut now! Grey Poupon fuckers! I just eat a whole jar of that shit to show how rich I am. Use that shit as fuckin moisturizer too. Fuckin burns my fuckin face. I feed lobster to my dogs. I drive around the fuckin golf course in a Cadillac. That my fuckin golf cart. I have to pay for the whole golf course to be replanted with grass every time I play. That’s my fucking life. Don’t wear it out. Fuck yeah. Check out these fucking songs AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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AFTER THE FIRE THERE ARE ONLY ASHES   Leave a comment

Here’s a picture of those fucking Gooffee fucks tearing shit down at the FIRE SALE party we did on Saturday. Here’s that motherfucker Max Le Daron:

Yeah sure it’s a fucking Tuesday so we’ve had some time to recover but our heads still feel like rocks are inside. Thanks to these fucks for making the party amazing as fuck. How about we go grab some tunes and have ourselves a fucking time at our respective workplaces being tired and pretending to work but really looking at blogs. GO GRAB THAT SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!:

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WALMER IS BACK IN BUSINESS! FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, YOU’RE COOL, FUCK YOU!   Leave a comment

There was a moment recently where assholes and assholettes were stuck reading earnest blogs that talk about music in a way that they want the artist’s dick (or vagina) in their mouth. It was a dark time. Posts on Walmer were sparse. That time is over. Vacation is finished. You wanna relax in the sun then go hang out with the old folks in Florida or take a fucking Carnival Cruise or some shit. This is not Club Med or Sandals resort. So much fucking shit came out while we were gone. This post will get some of the individual songs. We gonna make a post about EPs too. It’s gonna be a festival of light. Gonna be like a fucked up Diwali mixed with Easter and Kwanzaa. Let’s get to that shit after the jump and look forward to new exclusives and new parties this fucking fall. Watch out. Click to see the tracks AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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YEAH WE ARE LATE WITH THE NEW MUNCHI COMP BUT IT WAS A FUCKING HOLIDAY IN CANADA SO LAY THE FUCK OFF   Leave a comment

Hey brosephs. A major fucking compilation came the fuck out over the weekend from Munchi. This shit right here is moombah explosives. Like if this fell into the wrong fucking hands then there would be a world wide terror alert because this is some of the best moombah ever released ever. Since it was technically released in July as well then that makes July 2011 the fucking Month of Moombah. Just look back at the posts for this month and all the hot shit that was falling from the sky like rain on a girl’s tits. There are songs on this thing from the regular moombah heroes and other fuckers like Hostage(?!?!). ANYWAY JUST DOWNLOAD THAT SHIT AND SAMPLE IT AFTER THE JUMP:

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MOOMBAHTON VIDEOS: TERRIBLE OR HORRIBLE?   Leave a comment

No

No (But there are some cool peeps in here so not really hating but it’s kind of boring like just people partying and you were not fucking invited so kind of bitter)

This is like the worst piece of shit ever made. Like put a fucking pillow on this bitch’s face.

THIS IS A FUCKING VIDEO:

You have far to go moombahton.

MOOMBAHCLOUDS OF FUCK AND OTHER DRUGS   Leave a comment

Hey bros! How many drinks have you had today? 2? 3? 15? The world is your oyster. How many times have you puked? 1? 3? It’s true. It’s the best way to feel good again after you start feeling a little woozy from drinking. The Dirty Frenchman worked with this dude who got fired for drinking at work. The guy would drink booze to work at a call centre and it’s like if you’re gonna get boozy than get boozy to do some fucking fun work like being a fucking bikini inspector or condom tester or a sex haver or secret shopper at Walmart. A lot of moombah again on the plate today. Don’t know what we’re gonna do with it all. Been eating a lot of moombah lately. Maybe too much. Gonna get mad fat and have to have that moombah removed by liposuction. MUSIC IS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

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LE WEDNESDAY DE SOUNDCLOUD SUPER   Leave a comment

Ah, Paris in the springtime. When soundclouds fuck and have babies. This picture depicts what happens to Paris when soundclouds fuck and doves cry. The Eiffel Tower falls down and then no one can go up it and they just have to use it as a bridge to cross the fucking river. If you are gonna cross that long twisted bridge then you will need some music and you can listen to some soundclouds. Super fucking soundcoulds. On Wednesday. Let them molest your ears with their sound AFTER THAT JUMP YOU CUNTEATERS!

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SOUNDCLOUDS SHOVED SO FAR UP YOUR ASS THEY CAME OUT YOUR MOUTH   Leave a comment

Hello fucks! Do you know who the fuck I am? I’m fucking Colonel Sanders. Yeah. That’s fucking  right. I’m dead. So dead. But I came the fuck back to life to write for the Walmer Convenience Musical Blog. You don’t even know what the fuck I’ve been up to! I’ve been making fried chicken for Jesus! He fucking loves it! Eats that shit every fucking meal. Motherfucker is fat as fuck now but he still gets all the bitches because he’s fucking Jesus! But whatever, I’m not here to talk about my boring life doing blow off of angel tits and having “cloud parties” (think of the dirtiest shit you can imagine and then multiply by 100). No, my job is to show the the songs that menat the most to me during my time on Earth. Sure most of these fucks weren’t born yet when I died but that’s not important. What is important is the music. Let’s fucking listen. AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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