Archive for the ‘daniel haaksman’ Tag

FUCKING MOOMBAH MEGAPOST   Leave a comment

Damn son, where’d you find that sticker? Boom! Another fucker rockin Walmer swag. Who the fuck is this? Fucking babySTEPS. Have you checked out his soundcloud? There is some hot ass music up in that bitch. His remix of Heartbreak’s “Blaze Up” is fucking phenomenal. Basically you need it in your life. But enough chit-chat. What the fuck are we here for? To talk about feelings and shit? No. We’re here to fucking have some sick tunes so let’s go get that hot moombahton AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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CRAZY TORONTO NIGHTS   Leave a comment

These are the Buraka Som Sistemas. They fucked the hell outta shit in Toronto on Friday. Big ups to Diggy Scott at Underdog for hooking us the fuck up. We were right in the shit as you can see. Met and re-met some great dudes:

Sto looks like he spilt beer all over himself. He’s here with Conductor from Buraka. When Buraka was on it was so poopin off that people couldn’t fucking deal. Place was packed tighter than a newborn’s vagina. Yeah. We’re disgusting.

Fucking Bear Witness from fucking A Tribe Called Red with the disgusting ass Dirty Frenchman. Damn straight those motherfuckers were playing that night too and they had already got the place going so crazy it was hard to believe that anyone could follow. Only Buraka could pull it off. Enough bullshit though. It was a great show. LET’S GET SOME NEW MUSIC AFTER THE JUMP!

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NO MOOMBAHTON ALLOWED   2 comments

Do you want moombahton? There is no moombahton in this post. You came to the wrong place. Turn around. Go back to where ever you came from. We can’t post moombahton all the time everyday. No. You gotta break the addiction. Walmer Convenience is not some kind of “moombah-only” blog. We have fucking horizons. We have dreams. Don’t put us in some kind of moombahton box. Boom! That’s all we fucking feel like writing so go fuck yourselves looking for laughs and shit. GO GRAB ALL NON-MOOMBAHTON SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!:

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SOMETIMES LIFE RAPES YOUR ASSHOLE   Leave a comment

Hey all you fuckers. How’s your fucking Monday? We’re fucking depressed. The SLOWED party went great. The only thing that went wrong was THAT FUCKING TRAKTOR DECIDED TO TAKE A HUGE SHIT THAT NIGHT AND NOT WORK!. So we had to use Seraato in internal mode which is like using a pen to draw a mural so we spun like old used dead cunts and sure eventually we got the hang of it but not before our dj cred was questioned and we looked like assholes. Yeah. Whatever. Huge bigups to the Torro Torro dudes and the Le Dew It posse and Jasmine for being cool while we shat our pants all over the floor of the Crawford. We could have had a better look. Good to meet the fucking Young Lord as well. Oh well. Hopefully they have us again in the future. Anyway, there will be more time for crying. Let’s listen to the fucking music  AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP:

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THE CLOUDS ARE FUCKING THE SOUNDS   Leave a comment

Pop quiz hotshots! Your mom walks into your room while you’re wacking off and listening to soundclouds. What do you do? Ha ha! Yeah, it’s me dudes. I’m Keanu fuckin Reeves. I love blow and I love weed and I love crying on the tits of teenage girls. That’s my job, that’s what I do. I don’t wanna answer any more questions about it. I’m just trying to keep the spirit of cowabunga alive in Hollywood because everyone else is keeping alive the spirit of bullshit and crap in this town. It’s no good I tell you. Every swanky party I get invited to, I piss on the food to show that food and piss are the same. It’s a statement. The kick me out and I laugh because in the end the joke is on them. They’re the sheeple. They’re the ones walking around with their eyes closed eating piss food and they don’t even know it. But really I’m getting off topic here. I didn’t come to teach you groovy life lessons from a duderino that has done blow off Julianne Moore’s freckled tits. I came to present you some music. And that’s what I’m gonna do AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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