Archive for the ‘booty’ Tag


ImageLook at these fucks! Pickster and Brent “Fuckmaster” Tactic going back2back like motherfuckers in motherfucking Austin, Texas. These guys are soundboy murderers. These fucks play the fucking moombahton mainly but we don’t give a fuck. We are gonna put a picture of them on a non-moombahton post. That’s just the way we fucking are. Slide of hand motherfuckers. Magic motherfuckers. Ain’t no thang. Alright. Enough bullshit. Here’s some fucking music. GO GRAB THAT SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!

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WEDNESDAY BONUS BASS!   Leave a comment

So it’s been a moombah (also known as moom moom)  fuckfest this week. Lots of new shit. But there is other great shit in other genres that we have had to ignore. So this is the time we are posting that shit. A person cannot live off moombahton alone. You would be going to slow. You would be late all the time. But you would still not be relaxed because you would still be going faster than rap or other bass musics. So let’s grab thos fucking tunes and pretend we have a wide spectrum of tastes beyond moombah based musics AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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OLD BASS AND THE SEA   1 comment

Do you like bass? Do you like the sea? Well then you should take these fucking songs and go to the sea and listen to them and stay out too long and get a sunburn and then do that again several fucking times and get skin cancer and go to the hospital and when you get there you can see how many people actually care about you and those that don’t fucking come are not your real friends and you can delete them from facebook and that will be your life. LIVE THAT FUCKING LIFE AFTER THE JUMP!

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It’s your boy David Beltran aka Ms. Ghettophiles aka baby starfoxxx aka cradle rocker.

The boys from the highly respected internationally recognized media outlet for future bass (aka Walmer Convenience) has allowed me to join the team for a little bit. I am honored to join such a prestigious and historical staple in Canadien journalism.  I went and read the whole story about this blog and I must say…..BORING. You canadiens and your 3 down football and Toronto raptors experimentations. I gotta hand it to you though, you sure beat us in the “Quality of life” game.

Anyhow, I went searching for good canadien bass music and all I could find were Rush forums with sappy stories about how Neil Peart smokes crack now. I had to tap into my inner creep to dig so deep and far into the realms of  musical snuff to find this awesome Juke producer from Calgary. Not only is his name cool, but this is real real authentic, dark fucking Juke music. Approved from Chicago.

Feel free to hit me up on twitter @davidbeltran84 If you are a girl from Canada trying to swoon me don’t even bother. my internet heart already belongs to  KaleighMackay  but if you’re a boy in Canada feel free to stalk her. Actually, don’t feel free, that’s strictly an American thing.

Posted August 16, 2011 by davidbeltran84 in Uncategorized

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Yeah. At fucking work. Drank to many beers last night. Feel like fucking throwing up on the keyboard at this fucking computer. Don’t even know why this fucking picture is here. Just thought you wanted to know that a clean fucking restroom makes people fucking happy. If the restroom is dirty are people more likely to puke? Do people prefer to puke in clean restrooms like fucking royalty and shit? Are you too good for a dirty restroom? would you still shit in a dirty restroom if it meant either doing it in your pants or doing it there? Why do you think you’re so important? Relax. Just listen to these fucking songs AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP FUcKERS!

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Hey bros! What a gwaan? How’s your mom doing? Is she good? We tried to call her but she wouldn’t pick up. We left a message. Is she still upset about the thing? We just weren’t ready for the commitment she wanted. We still have so many things that we feel we need to accomplish before we settle down.  And, well, let’s admit it, we just aren’t ready to be a dad to you. It’s too much pressure. Sorry. MUSIC AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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All of you need to chill. Stop puttin that fuckin crack in your cornflakes. Enjoy the music of life. Drink wine in a park in the springtime. Throw up in a casual, relaxed way. For example, you could keep your hands in your pockets while you throw up. You’re like “I think puking in a bathroom or acting embarrassed about my puke is too formal and stuffy.” Oh and by the way we don’t always have to write some clever ass post for y’all as if that is al we have to do in life. Life. Music:

Yolanda Be Cool – Villalobos For Presidente (Dubbel Dutch Remix)

Lay It Down (Emynd Booty Bass Remix)

King Kong – Drive By (Original Mix)

Nintendo – Super Mario Theme (Artistic Raw Remix)

Sajna De Vehre (NEKI STRANAC Moombhangra Rework) – Shukshinder Shinda vs.Stas Relide vs.David Guetta

MO MUSIC, MO PROBLEMS   Leave a comment

Biggie made music and now he’s dead. Big Pun ate food and also made music and now he is in Latino Heaven. Kurt Cobain made music and tears and now he is in white people hell. The point is that music is like cigarettes and the more you make the more likely you are to die. It’s a fucking FACT. Ask a fucking doctor:

“You’re gonna fucking die of syphilis and music kiddo”

See? Anyway. Here’s some fucking tunes because we hate you and will dance on your grave once you are gone.

This one is like you took a rocket ship in the 1980’s and it’s fuelled by crack:

Robyn – Cobrastyle (Bloody Beetroots Remix) (mediafire)

This one is like you’re on a roller coaster that goes through a circa 1950s circus where instead of using trumpets, they use pussys to create music:

Ding Dong – Swag (mediafire)

This song is like you are in a fucking storm where instead rain it is lazers falling out of the sky and you are drunk on gin and maybe having sex:

Sticky Noodles – Booty Drop (mediafire)

This song is like they put Kanye in a centrifuge but he still had feelings and wanted to say something about how he cries sometimes. But you enjoy that:

Kanye West – Runaway (Dj Sega Philly Club Remix) (mediafire)

BODY ROCK!   Leave a comment

MC Zulu & Douster – Body Rock (zshare)

Sometimes you gotta cry because that fucking octapus that predicted who would win the world cup died today. The Dirty Frenchman is crying because Rob Ford won the election in Toronto. Sometimes you gotta get angry because the world is spiralling out of control and there is nothing you can do about it. Sometimes you just gotta look at Kim Kardashian’s ass and be thankful that shit like that exists to make the world bearable. And sometimes you need to go to this:

Check that shit on The Social Network.

DON’T FORGET!   Leave a comment

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