Archive for the ‘barefoot’ Tag

FREE SHIT: LAUNDRYMIX IS…BOOTY FULL STEP   2 comments

ImageDon’t ask us what the fuck Booty Full Step means but ask yourself “Why have I not downloaded that shit?”. It’s free. It’s not like a fucking movie that will eat up your bandwidth and it’s fucking good. There are no minuses in this. What do you get for your minimal trouble? A tossed salad of dopeness made of different global bass genres like moombahton, baile funk, b-more and other winning shit. It’s energetic, you might get laid if you play it. Lots of reasons. GRAB THAT SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!

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Posted February 28, 2012 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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STICK THESE SOUNDCLOUDS IN YOUR ASS   Leave a comment

It’s the weekend. While we take your mom out for some hot sexing you need some good tunes to distract yourself. You are a lazy fuck. You obviously couldn’t go on soundcloud yourself and start finding shit on your own. That would mean having to turn on your modem, dial up your ISP to connect to the internet and then waiting for 3 hours for one song to download because this is you computer:

Basically your life is terrible. Your mom gets fucked by bloggers and your computer is a phone with internet speeds from 1993. The least we can do is provide you with tunes. GO GRAB THAT SHIT AFTER THE JUMP!

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WEEKEND PARTY TIME FUCKFEST   Leave a comment

These people are fucking partying, who are they partying to? US FUCKERS! That’s who. We demolished 751 on Saturday like your dad demolished your mom and inpregnated her with you. That’s how we roll. At points bitches were dancing on tables and shit. Do we have photos of that? No. Are we lying then? You’ll never know. Whatever, we took a bunch of shitty pics. GO GRAB SOME FUCKING TUNES AFTER THE JUMP AND CHECK CRAPPY PICS OF THE BAD TASTE JAM! BIG UP STEVE ROCK OF THE GOOD KIDS FOR HAVING US!

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BASSKETBALL   Leave a comment

The Dirty Fucking Fremchman never saw Baseketball. He was probably readings books like a bitch. You hear that kids? Only bitches read books. Don’t read. Don’t stand out by being smart. No one likes smart people. In a sense, being smart is stupid. Make that your slogan. Anyway. There has been so much shit coming out music wise that we can’t keep the fuck up. Also we like to drink. If you drink you feel like fucking puking. If you feel like fucking puking it’s hard to be funny. That’s our life. WHY DON’T YOU GO GRAB SOME FUCKING TRACKS FOR THE FUCKING WEEKEND WHILE WE CHUG WATER AND MUNCH ADVILS!

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GARBAGE BINS FULL OF MUSIC   Leave a comment

You fucking became a homeless fuck. You got raped in the alley everyday. You said “That’s life”. You liked it. It helped mark the time. That’s how you rolled. No one could take that away from you. You found music in the garbage one day. It changed the fuck out of your life. You started to wear headphones while you got raped. It added a whole new angle. Rape would never be the same again. Musical alley rape. The future of alley rape. The future is today. GO GRAB SOME FUCKING TUNES AFTER THE JUMP FUCK BAGS!

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FRIDAY NIGHT IN FRONT OF THE GARBAGE   Leave a comment

Some kids hung out in front of the coffee shop or the convenience store. You fucking hung out in front of the fucking garbage. That was your home away from home. You always wondered “What are people gonna put in there next?” Life was just a string of endless surprise and wonder. You ever took to calling them “The Wonder Years”. The night was always your favourite time. Such strange shit would get put in there. Syringes, used condoms, dead cats and much more. It was like a terrible Christmas. But it couldn’t last forever. One day they took the garbage away and moved that shit to another corner. You were fucking heartbroken. You tried to follow it. Other kids were hanging around it. They kicked your fucking ass. Now you walk the streets lost. Last Thursday you spent 3 hours holding your gun in your hand, thinking: What if? LIFT YOUR SPIRITS WITH THESE FUCKING TRACKS AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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HELLCLOUDS & FUCKCLOUDS   Leave a comment

Well, gonna try to put up as much shit as possible since shit is gonna get crazy starting tonight. Djing and working a day job. It’s a win-win-lose. We can’t always be internet stars all the time. We have to get down from our ivory fucking virtual tower and walk among the people. See what you fuckers see. Taste what you taste. Turn you onto the dark side with speeches like this:

Basically, how are we gonna meet your mom and make you the little brother (or sister! right ladies?) you always wanted if we are not out there djing and impressing her and making her vagina damp. Maybe we will play some of these songs for her. GO GET THEM AFTER THE JUMP CUNTS!

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