Archive for April 2011

THE SOUND THAT FUCKS THE CRADLE   Leave a comment

There are so many songs in the world that sometimes we just want to go crazy. It’s like American Beauty except it should be called Canadian Beauty and it should star us instead of Kevin Spacey and some has-beens (or just all has-beens). Whatever. Relax. Play some music. Do a line of blow off a breast. Take a chill pill. Take a fuck pill like the viagras. Want some tunes? THEY’RE AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP PERVERTS!

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BALTIMORE MIXTAPE MYSTERY   Leave a comment

Hello, this is Oscar™ Award winning actor Tomathy Hanks. I have won many things in my time from the chance to take a hellride to the moon to the opportunity to make fat stacks of cash pretending to be other people. It’s a living. Anyway, I have been asked to present for the  Walmer Convenience Musical Blog the mixtape of an amazing disc jockeying legend from the United States of America. WHO THE FUCK IS IT? FIND OUT AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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Posted April 28, 2011 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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THE MEDIA IS OUT OF CONTROL   1 comment

Posted April 27, 2011 by walmerconvenience in Uncategorized

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THE MUSIC SOUNDS BETTER WITH YOUR MOM   1 comment

Hey bros! What a gwaan? How’s your mom doing? Is she good? We tried to call her but she wouldn’t pick up. We left a message. Is she still upset about the thing? We just weren’t ready for the commitment she wanted. We still have so many things that we feel we need to accomplish before we settle down.  And, well, let’s admit it, we just aren’t ready to be a dad to you. It’s too much pressure. Sorry. MUSIC AFTER THE FUCKING JUMP!

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NEVER FORGET TORONTO: APRIL 29TH @ THE CRAWFORD AND MAY 6TH @ THE PORT   1 comment

DID YOU DRINK ALL THE SOUNDCLOUDS DURING EASTER?   Leave a comment

Hey kids. Wassup? Phillip Seymour Hoffman here. Relax ladies, I’m taken. I wanna take a moment to talk to you about respect. That’s right. I understand it’s tough to be a teen nowadays. Hell, I grew up on the wrong side of the tracks and I’ve seen and, yes, done a lot of shit in my day. Just like you I’ve had to mix paint chips with chocolate milk to make mouth wash. Just like you I had to sell my sister for toilet paper again and again. No one gave me any breaks. We never had chocolate eggs during Easter. No, we had to eat real eggs. And not in the way you think. When the Easter bunny would bring us eggs it would be our parents taking the eggs out of the ovaries of an actual bunny. I know the same thing happens to you kids all the time. Life is hard. Here’s some cool tunes for you guys to listen to. To help you forget the hardship. AFTER THE JUMP!

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DA CYPHA   4 comments

Remember rap music? We have videos for it..

New Yayo and Mobb Deep, Body Bag…these fuckers about to go hard in the paint…

More shit after the jump yo..

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